Meditation: Awareness and Attitude

"Go in and in and turn away from nothing that you find." So reads the last line of a poem by the great Danna Faulds. I love this line because it expresses one of the most important aspects of the attitude that should be brought to our meditation practice.

All too often, people don’t succeed at their practice because they bring misplaced expectations of simply sitting down and becoming instantly peaceful. When this doesn’t happen, or when the opposite happens and the mind seems to become even busier, we come to the conclusion that we must be doing something wrong.

The first thing to remind ourselves of as we come to our meditation spot is that we are not trying to achieve anything. The silence and peace that we seek is already there. There is nothing our minds or willpower can do to create a natural state. The more we try to create it, the more we go in the opposite direction.

At the same time, as we sit, we are aware there is a lot more going on than we expected. Sounds, thoughts arising from who knows where, sensations that seem to intensify as we get quiet and emotions that seem to be convincing us to get off the cushion and just get on with our day. Knowing that all of this will happen and that thoughts, sensations, emotions and sounds are a normal part of everyone’s meditation experience, even the masters, should help us settle down and stop fighting with what is arising.

Instead, we can bring our awareness to that which is noticing all of these things. So, a thought arises, and if we allow it to be as it is, we can also begin to notice that there’s a presence that is noticing the thought but that doesn’t have any need to follow it, to judge it or to expand on it. In other words, we become aware that thoughts are just happening, coming out of nowhere seemingly and we don’t have to either believe or not believe them. Let them come and go like clouds.

But what is awareness? Can you feel that place within you that can hold the space for all thoughts, all sounds, all sensations, all feelings without needing in any way to control them? This is true meditation. Letting go of control.

Over time as we practice abiding in that which is aware, we begin to rest more comfortably in that place of pure awareness rather than getting hooked into every thought or emotion that comes our way. This is the cause of suffering . . . believing our thoughts and emotions when they are in fact simply the result of our experiences and conditioning. In true meditation we learn to observe all of the unfoldings of our experience from a place of stillness.

There is an aspect of us which is unchanged by circumstances. In our meditation practice we are learning to abide in that as we go "in and in," as it were.

What we resist or turn away from is actually a teacher because it shows us exactly is that with which we still identify, where our illusions about ourselves and the world still lie. It can be helpful to inquire into what we’re resisting in meditation and gently turn towards it with our awareness.

If we’re honest we’ll realize that what we resist in meditation is the exact same as what we resist in life. It could take a matter of seconds or it could take weeks, but in time, if we continue to courageously turn towards everything that is arising, we find that we not only feel moments of freedom or pure awareness in meditation but that it begins to fill our lives with an ability to be in the flow and beauty of each moment, no matter what it looks like on the surface.

We begin to feel and trust spirit moving in every moment. This same energy guides us beautifully in all of the choices that make up our days. We effortlessly begin to eat wholesome food, go to bed earlier, spend time in nature, feel joy from the simplest of activities, create more harmonious relationships, and are drawn to authentic ways to express our interests and abilities.

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